I was in a restaurant having my meal with my parents when something is not up to my level of satisfaction and thus, I spilled out my anger towards them.Yes, I know it isn't healthy for my physiological state - finding a way to solve my problem in semi conscious mind instead of facing it in reality but I also feel quite relief after I woke up. Oh my, I should start making appointment to see one of my readers, which also a counselor, Waliz to spend countless hours and money just for talking 'to a friend'. No offense Waliz.
What Is Anger?
Anger is "an emotional state that varies in intensity from mild irritation to intense fury and rage," according to Charles Spielberger, PhD, a psychologist who specializes in the study of anger. Like other emotions, it is accompanied by physiological and biological changes; when you get angry, your heart rate and blood pressure go up, as do the levels of your energy hormones, adrenaline, and noradrenaline. (blah blah blah - I just copy and paste).
In a normal words, anger is when you feel something boiling up inside you and you feel like wanna punch somebody. In case you are an alien from outer space, this feeling (or what they say, emotion) is a normal for an average person. However, it is becoming a problem when you can't control it and it affects your daily routine.
What Cause Your Anger?
If you want me to list out 100 things that will trigger my anger button, I be well passed 150 by now. To summary the very long list, I think what really make me angry is reoccurrence of human stupidity. I know it is a very strong word to use, but it is true. Whether it is other people stupidity; translation: when one person made a stupid decision and others will have to suffer the pain, or when people are taking advantages from your own stupidity; such as cheated on you in your less knowledgeable field. It is a natural thing for ordinary human to make mistake due to its own imperfections, but, we should all learn from the past and try to avoid it to reoccurs again.
Identify Your Source Of Anger
These questions might be helpful. Do you express anger in a way that overwhelms you and others? Do you get angry more often than most people you know? Do you get angrier than is necessary? Do you use threatening language or gestures? Do you get angry enough to hit, throw or kick things, people or animals? Do you seethe for hours? Do you hide angry feelings from others or try to suppress your feelings? Do you use alcohol or drugs to calm your rage? Do you experience physical reactions such as muscle tension or a racing heart when you get angry? Does expressing your anger usually leave you feeling better about yourself and the person who angered you?
I think Victoria Beckham is very pretty, but she seems to think that
smiling is not fashionable. So, I decided to lend her a smile from one of
my favorite TV series character to her. Check my other blog to
find out who he is - Bluecrystaldude
Anger Management Tips
The problem is not anger, the problem is the mismanagement of anger. Mismanaged anger and rage is the major cause of conflict in our personal and professional relationships. Domestic abuse, road rage, workplace violence, divorce, and addiction are just a few examples of what happens when anger is mismanaged. Here are some of the anger management tips (partially extracted from MayoClinic.com) to help get your anger under control:
- Take a time out
- Do something physically exerting
- Find ways to calm and soothe yourself
- Once you're calm, express your anger as soon as possible so that you aren't left stewing
- Think carefully before you say anything
- Work with the person who angered you
- Use "I" statements when describing the problem to avoid criticizing or placing blame
- Forgive the other person
- Keep an anger log/list
- Use humor to release tensions
Bluecrystaldude